Seeing God in the Waiting - Section 2

     What do you do when you are in a period of waiting? Waiting on something or for something is never easy, and it's not always fun. It's hard. It's difficult, but there is a reason for the waiting periods. Even in the waiting God is there. It may be hard to recognize that when things aren't going our way, or when things aren't when we want it. Waiting time is not wasted time. We have to remember the work that happens during the waiting is just as important as whatever we are waiting for. Let's be for real... We would much rather skip the waiting and jump to the exciting times. No one likes the waiting part before a vacation. You just wanna go on the trip already. Too often we want God's resources, but we don't want His timing. Waiting on the Lord requires patient trust, which means we have to be patient and trust His timing. The waiting is not easy, but it gets easier when we place our hope in Him.
Isaiah 40:30-31 says, ''Even youths will become weak and tired, and young men will fall into exhaustion. But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.''
Sometimes when we are in a season of waiting we miss what God wants us to see. Things are going to look different to God because of the eternal perspective He has. He brings all things together for our good, even when we can't see it.

I am literally in a waiting period as I am writing this, and I promise it is not easy. I am writing this as our entire world is facing a global pandemic. It's very scary, and pretty much everyone's life is on hold. I just keep thinking, maybe there is something God is doing in the midst of all this. There has to be something He wants us to see that we haven't before. The whole world is at a pause. There has to be a reason God is separating us from seeing people. He is even clearing our schedules of our day to day lives. He is even ridding us of distractions. Through all of this, we have a choice of what we will do with all of this change and free time. Maybe people will start reading their bibles more, and spending family time they never had before.

We can choose to draw near to Christ like never before, or sadly, we could choose to bow to fear that the media is displaying. In times of waiting, like the time I am writing this, we need to listen to the truth of God, not the world. We need to be patient and trust He will make all things work for His good.

Romans 12:11-12 says, ''Never be lazy, but work hard and serve the Lord enthusiastically. Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying.''

In the time of waiting, take advantage of it. He tells us, Don't be lazy, but work hard. Serve Him enthusiastically. Psalm 30:11 says, ''You have turned my mourning into joyful dancing.'' We may think, ''I know God can and will turn my mourning into dancing, but when? When will you do that God?'' That is one thing we don't have to wait for! He will turn our sorrow into joy when we rest in Him. When we don't bow to fear, we can bow to Him instead. So in the waiting, be still and recognize who He is.

WAITING IS NOT WASTED TIME.

Psalm 45:10- ''Be still and know that I am God.''

Knowing about God and Knowing WHO God is - Section 1

This was inspired by notes I took from a sermon by Sadie Robertson and lots of bible studies.

There is a difference in knowing something and believing in something. Knowing something means to be familiar with it. Believing in something is a totally different aspect. You can know many things and be so familiar with it that it is just a fact to you. Believing in something means you accept that it is true. In the same way, lots of us do this with God. We think we know God because of the picture our society has created for what it looks like to live a Christian life. You can know stories in the bible, memorize verses, go to church often, and even be a great person, and still not know who God is. The reality is, the only way we can come to know who He is, is through relationship with Him. John 14:6 says, ''Jesus told them, I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.'' I think the reason so many people don't really come to know Christ is because they think they already know Him. Their lives may look similar to a person who actually knows Jesus, that they think they are saved too. The truth is, doing good things and following rules doesn't make us right with God. I once heard in a sermon ''your good deeds won't get you into heaven, and your bad deeds won't keep you out.'' If doing good things, being an overall good person, and knowing things about Jesus doesn't necessarily mean we know Him, then how do we come to know Him? We have to start a relationship with Him, and not only start one, but have a continuing relationship with Him. This starts by believing in our hearts that Jesus is Lord, accepting Him to come into our lives, and make us totally brand new. Romans 10:9 says, ''If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.'' It begins with giving our lives to Him. Now that we know it, now that we believe it, we have to realize who God is. Realizing something means to fulfill it. Sometimes we are so content with knowing it, but we don't care to fulfill it. You can know something, but it may have know affect on your life. It's just like another fact to you. When you realize something it can change your life. When you realize who God is, He will change your life. So why have we not come to the realization yet? You just have to realize who you already are. You're already loved. You're already seen. You already have a purpose. You are already all of these things not because of anything you've done or will do, but because of who you are and who you belong to. You belong to Jesus. He has already chosen you. You just have to realize it now. If realizing something means to fulfill it, then what does fulfill mean? The word fulfill means to step into reality. Jeremiah 29:11 says, ''If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me.'' God has already chosen us. We have to be the ones who choose to follow him, and no one else can decide that for us. When you seek God, I promise you will find Him. You have to turn towards Him. You also have to cut things out. You have to cut out sin, and cut out anything that pulls you away from relationship with Jesus. "Why exactly do I have to cut things out for Jesus?'' "I thought Jesus died for me already, so why do I have to walk out of sin now?'' ... We walk away from our nature to be transformed to look more like Christ. God has no part with sin, and sin is what separates us from God.
You're only going to see it when you see Him. You're only going to hear it when you choose to listen to what God has to say. Your hearts only going to change when you allow Him to change it. It's when you come to know Him, believe it, and fulfill it.I recently saw this anonymous quote that said ''If your experiences with Christianity has left you with more guilt and less joy, then you found religion, not Jesus.'' Man made religion is about what you can do for God. Jesus is about what He can do for you. That is the beautiful concept of it all. It's not about what we've done, but what He has done. The only way of coming to know Jesus is to start and continue a relationship with Him, and living a life for Him, not for ourselves.
"He must become greater and greater; I must become less and less.'' - John 3:30

A Cry For My Generation

Hey blog. This is Gracie and I just wanted to explain what the next few posts on my blog will be. Last summer I attended a church camp called Passage. Passage is not like any regular summer camp. In fact, it was different than any camp I have gone to. Passage is a youth and theology camp I had the chance to get accepted into. It is different because it's not just a camp you go to for a week, but it is a year long commitment. One of the requirements is to put together a little service project to benefit your community using your talents or passions. One thing I am very passionate about is writing, and I know I want to use that passion to reach others. For the past year I have been writing and working on a little book/devotional that I was planning to make into an actual booklet and pass out to my school and youth group. Due to the world's circumstances, it is unsafe for me to do so. Luckily, I have a blog I share my writings on, so the next coming posts will be what I would have put in the booklet. I wanted to hand out this booklet to teens in my community to reach others to give an understanding of who God is. Passage has really opened my eyes and given me a better understanding of who God is, so I would love for not only my community, but my generation specifically to have that understanding as well. Sadly, I cannot create and pass out the booklet for my community, but on the positive note I can post it to this blog for not only my community, but anyone online. Anyways, stay tuned for the next coming posts.  I'm very excited to share my message, "A Cry For My Generation.''

Forever Thank you to Passage for giving me this small opportunity to do big things.
- Grace

God Provides

The past few days have been pretty chaotic. This was my first Easter to not go to church with my family because of the whole pandemic going on in our world. That is already strange enough. We aren't waking up early to get dressed all nice to go to our church service, have our easter lunch, and take nice pictures. I knew my Easter was going to be different this year, but it was more than I expected. It's Sunday at seven in the morning. I hear a loud siren noise, then realize it is the tornado sirens. Before I have a second to even think, my mom comes running into my room and my brother's room insisting and motioning to run to her closet. I was scared because I sleep right next to a huge glass door. Barely awake, I jump out of bed, grab some sweatpants, my phone, and my teddy bear, then rush to the closet. We sat in there a little under an hour, and my little brother was terrified. Our pool in our backyard started to flood, and even my bedroom floor got a little water in it. Luckily, my dad handled all of that, and got the water to drain. My dad told us he had been praying during all of this happening. No tornados hit, and it was all good. After the storm passed, my family watched our church service live on the tv and sang worship songs. It all worked out smoothly. Later, I fell asleep in my parents bed for about three hours. I guess I was just exhausted from being up so early with not much sleep. A little while after my nap, wind started to pick up. The weather got bad again, just when we thought it was all over. It was really just super windy at this point. My family went outside in the front yard and observed everything. I looked up in the sky and there was a pretty rainbow. I immediately ran inside, grabbed my camera, and snapped a picture. Then I started to think about it. The rainbow represents God's promise. I thought about all the off and on chaos happening this day, and I realized God put this rainbow in the sky for a reason. It made me feel peace. It made me feel reminded to trust God, and trust that He works all things out for His good. When I went back inside I found the scripture about what the rainbow symbolizes. 

Genesis 9:11-17(NLT) says, ''Yes I am confirming my covenant with you. Never again will floodwaters kill all living creatures; never again will a flood destroy the earth. Then God said, I am giving you a sign and all living creatures, for all generations to come. I have placed my rainbow in the clouds. It is the sign of my covenant with you and all the earth. When I send clouds over the earth, the rainbow will appear in the clouds, and I will remember my covenant with you and all living creatures. Never again will the floodwaters destroy all life. When I see the rainbow in the clouds, I will remember the eternal covenant between God and every living creature on earth. Then God said to Noah, Yes this rainbow is a sign of the covenant I am confirming with all the creatures on earth.''

I was truly amazed. This was so beautiful to see on Easter Sunday. I started to reflect everything we learned this morning in our church service. Christ is risen. Luke 24:6 He is not here; He is risen! He is alive, and He is alive in us today. His promise still stands to this day, like the rainbow symbolizes. His love is abundant. We are forgiven. Many years ago, He paid it all on the cross. He freed us from the burden of sin. The shackles and chains that bound us to our past were defeated by the ultimate victor. The Savior of the world was mocked, spit on, crowned with thorns, beaten in front of many, nailed to a cross, and crucified. He endured so much pain and suffering, because He loves us. If I learned anything this easter, it is that life is precious. Who knows. A tornado could have swept through my house, and I could have died. Life is gone in the blink of an eye compared to eternity. I once heard in a sermon, imagine a bird picking up a grain of sand on mount everest, flying across the entire world to put it down, and doing this over and over until mount everest is completely moved across the world. Imagine how long that would take. Eternity is a million times that. A man from my church that played guitar on our worship team passed away Easter Sunday from a tree falling on his car from the wind and weather. All this really made me realize life is precious. My pastor said in our lesson, ''The more you make the world about you, the more miserable you will be.'' I thought about this and how true it is. It's because it's meant to be all about Him and His glory. Like my favorite verse John 3:30 says, "He must become greater and greater; I must become less and less.'' When we begin living for something much greater than ourselves, we will experience His true resurrection powers. So love and appreciate the life you are given. God has a purpose for your life, and He loves you so much. Your life is made for His glory. Let's start living for something much greater than ourselves!!

Now that's not the end to my story believe it or not. I went to sleep Sunday night, and it was still extremely windy. I woke up the next morning sweating and confused why my fan turned off. It took me a second to notice the power went out overnight from the wind. The entire day, I pulled out my old mario games and played them with my brother so my phone wouldn't lose it's charge. Later, my dad's friend let us borrow his generator. We just got a bunch of groceries, so we connected the generator to the fridge to keep our food from going bad. Down the road, our church had power, even though our house did not. My youth pastor called my dad and told us we are welcome to use the church to cook dinner in the kitchen and have some electricity. That is just what we did. We drove up to the church, and my mom made us some fish sticks and mac and cheese. I danced all across the church lobby leaping around and rolling on the floor. My mom told me to calm down because we are in ''God's house", and I said ''but mom he turns my mourning into dancing.'' I thought I was so funny okay okay. Then even later, I drove to my uncle's house who had power. I took a warm shower, and freshened up. This was all so nice, but I could have gone without it. I didn't necessarily need any of this. We all would have been just fine without electricity overtime, but God blessed us. Here again, God teaches me another lesson! As if Easter wasn't enough, He needed one more crazy day to happen to show me how merciful and great He really is. In the midst of all the craziness, God provides, and that is just what He did. Sunday morning He provided protection over my life and my family. He provided the rainbow in the sky as a reminder of His promise. He literally opened up His church to my family, so we could cook a nice meal. Then he did it again! He provided a place for me to take a warm shower, even though I could have settled with a cold shower. Philippians 4:19 says, ''And this same God who takes care of me will supply all your needs from His glorious riches, which have been given to us in Christ Jesus.'' God really does provide.  

Consistent Love

How beautiful it is, out of all the things in our lives that are changing, God is consistent. His love for us is consistent and unchanging. I'm so stuck on the fact His love is perfect. He's never selfish or manipulative. He's never quick tempered, impulsive, unkind, unjust, or unfaithful. He loves us in our lowest and weakest points. He saw us and sees us when we are broken. He doesn't want us for what good we have done. Afterall, He doesn't need us. He chooses us not because of who we are, but because of who He is. He is love. 

missing the travels :')

I think the reason I love traveling so much is because it feels like an escape. In a way it feels like life stops for awhile. I've learned that going somewhere far won't make your problems smaller. You can run so far, but your problems will follow. Although, just for a second, being away from all the drama, sadness, and issues in a small town feels freeing. It is breathtaking seeing beautiful sites. Feeling small while standing in front of the ocean makes some type of peace come over my body. Standing in a museum or in front of a historical monument makes you realize your problems really aren't so bad. 

I love looking out the window of a plane at the clouds before you and looking down at the big buildings that look small all of a sudden. It's mind blowing to go to sleep on a bus you've been on for twenty hours just to wake up the next day looking at the sunrise on a mountain. All of it makes you think. This is all God's creation. You see how beautiful and amazing it all is. It makes you realize out of all the creation that so amazing, God decided He needed you. We are His creation too. Seeing the world makes you not only realize how beautiful and amazing it is, but makes you realize how beautiful and amazing you are yourself. This is why I love traveling. There's something about going to another place on planet earth that makes me feel something great inside. It makes me enjoy myself more and be more appreciative of the world I live in that our God created. 

''You alone are the Lord. You made the skies and the heavens and all the stars. You made the earth and the seas and everything in them. You preserve them all, and the angels of heaven worship you.'' Nehemiah9:6 

''The heavens proclaim the glory of God. The skies display his craftsmanship.'' Psalm 19:1

A heart once burned, Always burns

  

 I really believe if you were once truly in love with someone, it's not going to ever go completely away. If your heart once burned for them, the fire can always be relit. At times you'll think about them, and it hurts. It hurts so bad, and you'll find yourself lying alone on the bedroom floor crying your eyes out because you saw or heard something that reminded you of them. You'll drive by the places you once spent together. At first, you'll smile a bit. Then, you'll feel an aching realization in your heart. You won't go to those places together ever again. You'll hear a song that will make you think of him. You'll think of all the good ways he made you feel, despite of all the bad.

   When you're in love with someone, your brain will turn all of the person's flaws into perfections. You unintentionally ignore all of the bad qualities of them. Your heart begins to take over, as if your brain was never needed. Knowing you deserve better and not wanting it is what will destroy you. 

   Months will go by with no communication with him. You finally start to feel like you can live without this person. Then you see them again. Those green eyes and that soft smile pull you back in like every other time. You find yourself talking about him in your day to day conversations. When he calls at two in the morning, you don't hesitate to answer. You hear his voice again, and he says your name like he used to. 

   Your heart warms because that's what it used to burn for, and still does. He'll touch you, and it will set you on fire, but again, he'll leave you there to burn by yourself. The fire starts again with his touch just for it to return to being ice cold. 

   More months go by without the random two in the morning phone calls. You haven't looked into those green eyes in awhile or heard him say your name. Your heart continues to burn for him, yet he's not there to keep the fire going. You try to find a spark with other people in desperation of the cold, but your heart freezes because they aren't him. 

   You think your heart only burns for him, so only he can relight the fire. Maybe he is the only one that can relight the fire, because you are continually handing him a match. 

What is to die for, Is to live for

 I was once asked ''What is worth dying for?'' I had many answers such as Jesus, my faith, my family, my friends, and people in my life I care about. One thing that really made me think was two of my closest friends, Taylor and Alli. So I asked myself "Gracie would you really die for these two?'' ''Why are they worth it?'' I really thought about it, and many reasons came to mind. 

  Taylor and Alli are the two people in my life who understand me the most. They came back into my life even when I was a terrible friend to them. Our beautiful friendship essentially began freshman year of high school, and it was so strong and solid. I was close with Alli then grew closer to Taylor through Alli and I's friendship. Sophomore year we hit a bump. We drifted apart. This was hard, and it really hurt me, but I pretended like it didn't and hung out with new people. These new people were not necessarily good people to be around. I didn't know it at the time because I was so blindsided. I lost all communication with Alli while I still talked to Taylor every now and then at school. Alli and I didn't get along at all, and I'll admit it, it was all stupid and petty. Nothing was worth losing a friend over. Not to mention my best friend I once did everything in life with. In the time period that we weren't friends, we were going through all of the same situations and dealing with the same issues. We both had no idea. For a whole year we were completely separated from each other. At times I would breakdown looking at old pictures of us or watching old videos we use to make. I missed them so much. I always wondered if my name ever crossed their minds. Do they miss everything we had? Do they miss spending every second of life together like I do? We would pass each other in the halls like we were strangers all over again. It hurt so much because I walk by thinking "It's like I don't even know you. It's like I never met you, yet you know everything about me, and I know everything about you.'' This felt worse than any breakup you could ever go through. Losing your best friends is a whole different type of heartbreak. It feels like you lost a part of yourself too. 

  Fast forward to the summer after sophomore year, I was on my way home from the beach. I remember just breaking down into tears thinking of how alone I am going to feel this next school year. I was still friends with some of those ''new people.'' I remember thinking, "Why do I feel so alone when I am surrounded by so many people." The reality is you can be in a full crowd and still feel like the loneliest person in the world, and you can be in a room with one other person and feel anything but alone. That's what I came to realize at the end of this summer. Then, junior year comes around. After being a terrible friend to them, they gave me a second chance. I reevaluated the people in my life. I began to invest in people who invested in me as well. Taylor and Alli became my best friends again. It was like we were reliving old times, and all the lonely feelings and worries disappeared. Now, I spend all my time with them, like once before. They make me laugh so hard until I can barely breathe. They hold me while I'm crying my eyes out. They tell me when I'm making stupid decisions, even when I don't listen to them. To all the driving around together, jam sessions in the bathroom, starbucks runs, to almost dying in the car together, and everything, I can't picture life without them ever again. If they didn't give me another chance I don't know where my life would be, or what I would feel like. I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't have my Taylor Riley and Allison Faye. They are my world as cheesy as that is. They were not in my life for a whole year, and I regret that year so much, but you live and you learn. I'll never understand why we were all three separated from each other for an entire year, and somehow found our way back together. I guess you really do always find your way back to the people that are meant to be in your life. I hope and I pray I never lose them again. My life is so much better with them in it. After all of this, I know they are so worth dying for. Overall I believe there is nothing worth living for if there is nothing worth dying for.

Broken World, Broken Heart

I don't understand. The way our world works, the way our hearts feel, the way our minds think. Why are girls so mean to one another knowing how difficult it is being a girl. We girls, we are full of many emotions. We break a little bit easier at times. We know as a girl, we worry about if our hair looks good today, if the things we have to say sounds stupid, or if our sweater looks good tucked into our jeans, yet we still are hurtful to one another. I don't understand it, but I'm guilty of it. I have been the mean girl, I have seen the mean girl, and I've been face to face with the mean girl. We have all been the mean girl at some time in our lives, and the reality is that we are selfish. We get caught up in ourselves too much we forget others feelings are just as valid as ours. I know this girl that goes to my school, and my heart breaks for her. I never typically liked her, but I don't have a problem with her. Constantly, people are tormenting her in some way. It's never a physical way, it's always verbally, which in my opinion hurts way worse. Words can be like a punch to the heart. The bruises that are left on our heart sticks around longer than bruises on our bodies. You don't have to like a person to be nice to them. In this life, not everyone is going to like you, and you won't like everyone either, but that gives us no right to be hurtful. Nowadays, all it seems like matters is being a tough person instead of being a good person. If coaches taught their athletes the game isn't just about winning, most would get so much farther in life. It's not always about how great you play or perform, but it's about where your heart is. The way you treat others shows where your heart is. You would think if someone experiences lots of heartache and sadness they would never wish that upon someone else, but that's not always the case. Usually the meanest people are the saddest. I wonder, is that why there's so much destruction in our world? Out of all the violence our country and world experiences, it begins with something small. It may start with something small such as hurtful jokes, or it may expand to something much greater involving violence. Those are just some examples, but the point I am trying to get across is that it all starts in your heart. I once heard a sermon talking about the ten commandments, and there was one detail that really stuck out to me. You may know the commandment ''You shall not kill.'' We may, and hopefully have not actually killed someone, but if you've had hate in your heart towards someone, you've committed murdered in your heart. This all leads back to where we began. Not understanding the way our world works, the way our hearts feel, and the way our minds think. The truth is, we won't always know why, because only God can. Only God fully knows and understands our hearts and how they work, ultimately because He is the creator of them. When we draw closer towards God, we see the nasty parts of our heart. It's like the closer you get to a light, the more blemishes you see. The great news is, God can do a heart transformation in us. Once we allow God to come in and change our hearts, the way we think will begin to change, and our actions will begin to change. Our hearts don't have to stay sinful. Our world doesn't have to stay the way it has become.

A Want or A Need?

  Today I was texting my friend Taylor simply asking what the better idea would be for me, to study or lay in my bed after school. I'm indecisive, and I am always asking my friends, "should I go here or there?'' "Should I choose this one or another?'' I asked Taylor, ''Should I just go home and lay in my bed?" She replies with, ''If you want." My response actually blew me away. I texted back with "That's what I want, but I don't know if it's what I need. After I read what I had just sent it utterly shocked me. I realized there was so much truth behind that one text message that I didn't intend to have any meaning in. It made me realize, sometimes, and most times, we know what we want, but it's not necessarily what we need. Yes, I want to go home and lay in bed scrolling through my social medias, but the next day when my test is thrown on my desk in front of me I'll be lost. I don't want to go home and pull out my algebra notes or read about physics, but to prepare for the test that is what I need. In the long run, getting through the time put into studying will benefit me more, and I can still make time later to snuggle up in my bed and scroll on my phone. In the same way, God shows us that what we want, isn't always what we need. Sometimes he takes away that thing our heart wants so bad, and hands us something we need, but it's going to prepare our hearts. We just have to trust that whatever God has, is so much better than anything else you can possibly imagine. He is so much greater than that one thing we want so desperately. Like studying our schoolwork , what God desires for us and what we need will benefit us much later on. We'll be more prepared for that test the next day, or the next trial that comes our way. 

    If what you want is not according to His will, think of how you can change that desire into something according to His will. Ask yourself, ''What do I need,'' not ''What do I want?" "What does God desire for my life?" 1 John 1:14- 15 says, " This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us. And if we know He hears us - whatever we ask - we know that we have what we asked of Him.'' This scripture is so eye opening. If the things we want are not for His will, we need new desires. Well how do I do that? Reality is, you can't, but God can. The first step is asking God to come in and change your heart. God will do a full heart transformation in you. You will see your life change from the inside out. I once heard in a sermon, ''God doesn't want to just go in your heart and rearrange furniture. He wants to blow the whole house up and make it brand new.'' That's what God wants, and can do in your life, if you simply open the door. It's that simple. As God changes our hearts, what we want will start to change as well. What we want will begin to look more according to His will, not ours. One of my favorite verses is John 3:30 ''He must become greater and greater; I must become less and less.'' When God comes in and changes our hearts, we become more selfless. We will want God's name to become more known, not our own, and that's exactly what we need. What we need is to become disciples for Christ. Making his name known is our purpose. What we need, is to fulfill our purpose, and that is to love and make Christ's love known. 

    As you go through your day, ask yourself, ''Am I doing what I want, or am I doing what I need,'' then take time to pray about that. 

Little Bit of a Sparkle

You really have to surround yourself with people who make your days brighter, not darker. Those people that push you to succeed. It's the ones that do what's best for you, not hold you back. Love and hold those people close to your heart. They're the ones who make life have a bit of a sparkle in it.